Disorderly conduct

Mark Twain writing in bed, seemingly awake, however.

It is time to admit that I have a serious writing disorder.

I cannot write while I am sleeping, and I am asleep a lot. I thought of referring to it as a sleeping disorder, but I don't really have any problem sleeping. Perhaps "consciousness disorder" is more appropriate.

We could even go so far as to trace it to my depressive disorder(s), but none of that would matter if I could overcome my ridiculously-irritating inability to write while I sleep. I have extremely bold and creative dreams--why isn't anyone taking notes? They seem to last for hours and trying to write them down every morning would require the time span of approximately 3 days. There are extensive plot lines, vivid colors, full soundtracks, foreign languages (okay, Arabic), and always guest appearances by ex-lovers, highly-desirable celebrities and/or musicians, and my beloved deceased pets wandering around. It can get quite congested.

Which is another reason I am sleeping so much. World's Longest Bout of Sinus Infection. Chronic headaches and facial pain are inarguably contraindicated as far as writing is concerned. Likewise, writing on migraine meds is difficult--especially from the perspective of moving one's fingers about correctly on a keypad--something I am not very talented at to start with. I think I just ended that sentence with TWO dangling participles.

As the Sundays are singing it on last.fm, "Here's where the story ends."

"But don't you have to get up for your dogs?" asks the astute and concerned reader. Let me tell you, dogs are just as eager to get back under the covers when it is 20 degrees outside AND their owner is cranky as shit from chronic sinus pain and a life without direction.


SodaPop (frequent dream visitor) and Ginger warming up my guest bed at Sarah and Jeff's about 5 yrs ago.